osuni: (sits)
okuni kumou ([personal profile] osuni) wrote in [community profile] fracturarpg2020-02-02 09:47 pm

world one: hi! welcome to chili's!

WHO: baren, okuni, boose the moose, and all partygoers
WHERE: Koi Pond
WHEN: 2/02
WHAT: the twins decide to throw their birthday party two days after that date auction despite all the chaos and kidnappings going on, and also okuni is supposed to be grounded but they let her out for her birthday ig. now everyone is trapped in this bar and forced to mingle.
WARNINGS: there's nudity?? but not like explicit ig, otherwise none



Everyone has most definitely received a cursed invitation in the form of a.) baren reaching out to the Mori and Neutral-aligned residents of Montevallo and b.) Okuni nagging everyone in the Xian Le and associated with the Xian Le, but REGARDLESS OF WHICH ONE YOU GET it all boils down to someone having a party at the Koi Pond tonight.

And what a party it is.

Whether you're unfortunate enough to arrive right on time or you stroll on in to stare at your surroundings like that community.gif, you'll see that the Koi Pond is decked lavishly with balloons on the wall and streamers on the floor and bright lights just about everywhere so no introverts can escape. There are tables loaded with food free of motor oil and pickle juice, music being played by a real live band, a photographer who is making it his job to get very close and in your face at every opportune moment, and a group of dancers decked with strands of pearls and feather fans and nothing much else (this is a co-ed dance troupe, we're equal opportunity here)! They sure are distracting, but they're not even close to the main attraction, no --

The real highlight of this night is Boose the Moose, wearing a glittery paper crown and placidly stepping inside the bar with two figures riding astride on top of him. yeah. it's Baren and Okuni on top their loyal steed, waving their hands at their guests like this was all planned and an elaborate attempt to trap the entire town of Montevallo in one bar.


But before you try shooting them off the moose, take the time to try a piece from the gigantic birthday cake laying resplendent on the table that has the words HAPPY BAPPY TWINS inscribed on the top!!! Incredible! Amazing!! Feel free to have a taste -- each tier is a different flavor, and some tiers are more unfortunate than others.

Now that you've found yourself enclosed in a space with either people from your enemy faction or people from two factions on the outs with one another, please take the time to greet either of the Demon Twins of Montevallo, each holding two pairs of handcuffs in each hand and gazing expectantly towards you. That or mingle at will, because someone locked the doors and windows and slid two iron bars through the handles!!

Just give up and have a good time at this terrible party... Indulge in some icebreakers!
- a plastic jar filled with strips of paper with world-breaking questions such as: If you were trapped in a burning building and could only save one person, would it be your family or your lover? or If you had to pick someone to be the last person on earth with you, would you pick Wei Wuxian or Kano? or just variations of Fuck, Marry, or Kill with different names on each slip
- a human sized dartboard for people to stand in front of and get hit by plastic darts
- the handcuff icebreaker where okuni or baren just handcuff you to someone that you now have to spend time with

As the night comes to a close, Baren and Okuni will take pity on their guests by opening the doors, just in time to set off twenty two fireworks in rapid succession right outside the bar itself.

✧・゚: *✧・゚:* HAPPY TWENTY-SECOND BAPPY TWINS!!! *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
crudest: (♚ his face got messed up)

ice break baby

[personal profile] crudest 2020-02-05 02:52 am (UTC)(link)
[yea it was rigged but regardless baren's going to peer over xl's shoulder and just

tilt his head]


Oh I've gotta hear this.
crudest: (♚ ya lying sack of lard)

[personal profile] crudest 2020-02-05 02:53 am (UTC)(link)
I'm thinking an elephant for the next round!

[hE'S JUST REALLY FIXATED ON THIS ELEPHANT THING HE'S MENTIONED IT LIKE TWICE but regardless - baren's just going to laugh.]

I dunno if I had hopes. [besides like the dirt low expectation that people wouldn't kill each other] Wasn't bad though.
crudest: (♚ deal or no deal)

[personal profile] crudest 2020-02-05 02:55 am (UTC)(link)
You can call me Baren, you know. [like he's just going to point that out now] I don't really care about formalities, Officer Tsucchi.

[hm]

But you can start picking 'em up now, if you want! Just leave enough for us to threaten people with - they won't move otherwise!
crudest: (♚ that reality and dreams got mixed)

[personal profile] crudest 2020-02-05 02:57 am (UTC)(link)
[terrible. absolutely terrible - because as soon as okuni's approaching, baren's turning to face her. because sure, it's both of their special days, and baren had a good time watching everyone's chaos. of course he did. but even more than that, he was happy that okuni was enjoying herself in all the rampant nonsense. that's what he loves more than anything, because it's his sister who he loves more than anyone.

so he just exhales a soft laugh when she comes up to him, reaching out to take her hand and letting them swing between them]


Mm.

Happy birthday, Okuni.

[happy bappy, okunapy]
crudest: (♚ i'm just fckin tired)

[personal profile] crudest 2020-02-05 02:58 am (UTC)(link)
That's Okuni's charm, make no mistake.

[AND NOTHING ELSE]
ittoryu: (t - smile.)

[personal profile] ittoryu 2020-02-05 03:05 am (UTC)(link)
Oh? And none of yours?
givethemhell: (get you connected)

SAME HONESTLY

[personal profile] givethemhell 2020-02-05 03:08 am (UTC)(link)
[anna will be happy because it's an even number.

Also god WHYMST. Wei Wuxian crouches down as well, reaching out to tap Lan Wangji's shoulder. No hiding here! Stop!!]


Do you think I can't see you, is that it? Unfortunately for both of us, I can see you perfectly fine.
souheki: (handholding)

[personal profile] souheki 2020-02-05 03:28 am (UTC)(link)
[STOP HE'S HIDDEN!!!

Slowly, almost like something out of a horror movie, he turns his head to peek over his shoulder through his hair, like he's checking if it's still Wei Wuxian. Then he'll just

turn around way too quickly

somehow not topple over considering he's still crouching??

and grab Wei Wuxian's tapping hand with both of his!!!

!!!

...and then just sort of stares at it like he's confused on how it got there.]
stressweets: Well, you might think that it would feel good to get lots and lots of stuff, but it doesn't feel nearly as good as giving something special to somepony you really care about. (089. secret of my excess)

[personal profile] stressweets 2020-02-05 04:29 am (UTC)(link)
I bid on her as well. [ WELL YEAH, TSUKASA, NO ONE DOUBTED THAT ] The same amount that I did for Xie Lian and for-

[ uh






a furtive look at baren




leaning closer ]
You, too. Um... Even though you're a handful, Miss Okuni, I do feel like you support me a lot in your own way, so I wanted to repay you in some small way, so I placed a small bid on you... I don't think I'll win, but I wanted you to know that I appreciate you.
Edited 2020-02-05 04:30 (UTC)
stressweets: . Always expect the best from your friends and never assume the worst. Rest assured that a good friend always has your best interests at heart. (063. party of one)

[personal profile] stressweets 2020-02-05 04:47 am (UTC)(link)
[ maybe he should call him baren, considering they're gonna be in-laws (JOKE DESU) ]

...Probably not. [ he can agree with that, relaxing a little. ] For a bunch of adults, you all sure act like a group of kids at a school dance... I'm not that surprised though. The Mori and Xian Le aren't exactly, mm... Besties, right? I mean, I think on an individual level, plenty of them get along without considering their loyalties - but altogether in a group it's different, right?
infinitesadness: ([29])

obi-wan to the rescue

[personal profile] infinitesadness 2020-02-05 04:59 am (UTC)(link)
[ honestly, it's incredibly entertaining to watch his young former apprentice Suffer at the hands of the dancers, especially after subverting everything he's tried to instill into him. this always seems to be the one area he failed the hardest at teaching (or maybe, did the best in? depends on who you ask probably ). eventually, he'll take pity and make his way over just before one of the girls really do start crying ]

Ah, Xie Lian I've been looking for you. [ without slowing his steps, he smiles apologetically at the girls as he casually snags Xie Lian and continues walking ] My apologies ladies, I need to borrow our friend here for a moment. Not to worry I'll make sure to make it up to you later.

[ how smooth ]
infinitesadness: Area Man A Walking Encyclopedia of Everything Except Leading A Normal Life ([01])

drunk as a skunk take five

[personal profile] infinitesadness 2020-02-05 05:04 am (UTC)(link)
[ i'm going out on a limb here and gonna say obi-wan's only heard the tales but he's never actually seen lwj drunk before. especially since it seems to be quite the uncommon experience and usually only featured in wwx's stories. therefore, there's only incredulous amusement on his face at his friend currently trying to rob the bar blind. ]

Wangji, I don't think even Wuxian can drink all of that.

[ in one sitting at least ]
infinitesadness: I've Got A Lot of Bad Ideas ([04])

b, blease save him from the demon children

[personal profile] infinitesadness 2020-02-05 05:10 am (UTC)(link)
[ obi-wan in all his benevolent 6 foot glory only continues sipping on whatever drink he got his hands on, not even glancing at her way ]

I assume someone is out for birthday revenge?

[ the image of her massive bundle of hair just sprouting out from his shoulder is hilarious ftr ]
counterclocked: (pic#13615421)

a

[personal profile] counterclocked 2020-02-05 05:27 am (UTC)(link)
[There's an almost immediate shake of his head, holding up a hand to ward off the cocktail.]

No thanks, man. I'm good on the drink.

[He is, however, handing him something! It's a very poorly drawn picture of an elephant. Happy birthday, Baren.]
givethemhell: (nerdass laugh)

[personal profile] givethemhell 2020-02-05 05:47 am (UTC)(link)
[TO BE FAIR, IT'S JUST THE NATURAL PROGRESSION OF ANIMALS GETTING BIGGER. Moose to elephant...]

Hah! You'll have to build an entirely separate place if you plan on riding an elephant inside.

[As if that's the biggest of their future potential elephant-related concerns?? Anyway it's good to keep expectations low so that's fair enough. He smiles, folding his arms across his chest.]

It was nice to see everyone warming up to things and having a good time. [FOR THE MOST PART. He's sorry about his drunk househusband.]
givethemhell: (plead)

[personal profile] givethemhell 2020-02-05 05:48 am (UTC)(link)
[Well that's a horrifying mental image that's going to stick with him for the rest of his life.

Anyway, he blinks down at their hands and then reaches out with his free one to pat Lan Wangji's shoulder.]


I need that hand, Lan Zhan! Come on, let's get you back to a chair. Can you stand up for me?
souheki: (step)

[personal profile] souheki 2020-02-05 07:40 pm (UTC)(link)
[ENJOY THE SPECTACLE, OBI-WAN. After tonight he is definitely never going to drink again, except maybe unless Wei Wuxian pouts at him, and even then it's just a maybe.

For now, though, he's just carefully stacking jars with intense focus, not because he cares that much about making a mess, but because if he breaks any then he'll have to go wandering around town to find more, and Wei Wuxian is here, not there.]


Mm. Saving. For later. [Where exactly is he going to store them...]
souheki: (loquats)

[personal profile] souheki 2020-02-05 07:51 pm (UTC)(link)
[Ah... a pat. He does that for Haku when Haku does a good job. Is he doing a good job? He wants to.]

Mm.

[He'll let Wei Wuxian help him up, surprisingly steady considering he's definitely not going to remember a damn thing tomorrow. Even once he stands up, though, he doesn't let go of Wei Wuxian's hand, continuing to hold it tightly with both of his. He's just gonna ignore the part where Wei Wuxian mentioned needing that.]
infinitesadness: Average Time Spent Being Happy Drops to 13 Seconds Per Day ([08])

[personal profile] infinitesadness 2020-02-05 08:35 pm (UTC)(link)
How assiduous you’re being.

[ he’d honestly like to record this moment for prosperity but that’s the struggle of being in a timey whimy au. instead he just quietly snorts with absolute fondness, eyes glancing around for wherever Wuxian vanished off too ]

Is there a reason for this?
souheki: (ponytail)

[personal profile] souheki 2020-02-06 12:34 am (UTC)(link)
[THAT'S HIM. He doesn't preen or anything, but Obi-wan's probably known him long enough to notice him pause briefly, looking pleased with himself, before he goes back to what he's doing.

But there are two things he is never compromised enough to talk about, drunk or not: 1. important Mori family secrets, and 2. the true depths of his gay feelings. He squints at his accumulated booze, though it's hard to tell if it's because he's thinking of a good response or if he's trying to count them.]


...Hide them from Haku. [what]
dianxias: (13.)

sighs

[personal profile] dianxias 2020-02-06 12:34 am (UTC)(link)
I--

[ what does he do? xie lian, quick, think on instinct!


what if he does just shove this paper in his mouth.






instincts bad ]
dianxias: (69.)

;___;

[personal profile] dianxias 2020-02-06 12:41 am (UTC)(link)
[ xie lian doesn't quite have a thick enough face yet to talk about not being able to get it up, so his master's presence is simultaneously an embarrassment and a relief. the girl finally lets him escape: xie lian bows his had as respectfully as possible, clasping his hands together and trying to look apologetic. he's so sorry for all of this. for everything. for his general everything.

there's not much saving face or space to get away, but xie lian immediately goes with obi-wan, and murmurs the minute they get around the corner: ]
...this disciple thanks you. [ ...because all he can do is go back to automated old teachings...and prepare himself for a lecture.

at least he's managed not to offend anyone too much this evening. he'd probably survive if someone tried to poison his water. ]
crudest: (♚ NYAHAHAHA)

[personal profile] crudest 2020-02-06 12:44 am (UTC)(link)
[








it's only because baren likes xie lian so goddamn much that he doesn't fucking lose it right in front of him

instead he's just going to look away and TRY TO COUGH AWAY HIS LAUGHTER TO HIDE IT

and also pick up a garbage bin to hand it to him wordlessly]


I never thought I'd say 'spit, don't swallow' but...
dianxias: (14.)

[personal profile] dianxias 2020-02-06 01:15 am (UTC)(link)
[ WELL HE DOESN'T HAVE TO ANSWER IT NOW DOES HE!

the paper tastes like. paper. and ink. but that doesn't mean xie lian doesn't valiantly stick with his Instincts: Bad plan. he's about to swallow it, actually, when baren cough-laughs and he starts turning red, sitting there awkwardly with the paper still in his cheek like some kind of squirrel.

the wastebasket appears in front of him, and xie lian coughs, and does in fact spit out this fmk paper, his eyes flicking up towards baren over the rim. he's not entirely sure what he's referring to with that remark but the not-quite-tolerant-almost-scolding-still-mortified expression on his face says that he knows. that tone generally means something wildly embarrassing!

this look has negative heat because he is literally spitting out a piece of paper he just shoved in his mouth like a scolded dog. ]
...thank you.

[ AHEM. ]
givethemhell: (get you connected)

[personal profile] givethemhell 2020-02-06 01:41 am (UTC)(link)
[He waits expectantly for Lan Wangji to let go of his hand for like a full 5 seconds before realizing that ah, no. No, he is not going to let it go.]

--Well, I guess one out of two is better than none out of two.

[Lan Wangji gets another pat for his good efforts, this time for his hands.]

You don't have to hold that tightly, though - it's not like I'm going anywhere. Come on, come this way.

[AWAYYY from the plant and over toward a bench. Probably the same bench he's led Lan Wangji to like fifty times tonight.]

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