fracturarpg | intro log.

Entry tags:

! intro

intro log.

welcome mingle

( AND SO IT BEGINS. )

There's nothing but the clatter of train tracks, and the odd feeling of almost floating.

When you wake, it's hard to tell exactly what it is that you're missing - only that you are. There are pieces that aren't quite right, even if you're not sure where those pieces would normally be. Pieces of what, exactly....? Well, if you had to put a word to it, it would be - yourself, probably.

The place you've found yourself in is strange, certainly. It's probably worth exploring a bit. Though it just as easily seems that the only form of welcome or explanation that you have, comes from nothing more than a slab of marble.

Well - that, and all the people who seem to have woken up alongside you, lost and also probably Doing Their Best™.

There's no need to fret that much though. It's hard to say exactly where you're going next, even though some places might feel a little bit more like a clue, but what you do know is one unshakeable thing:

There's still much more ahead of you.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Not as good as red pepper relish, huh?

[ Kano pokes a finger at Wei Xuxian's arm, but only in the chicken powder part and none of the relish to taste test. ]

Hm~ Well, food always tastes kinda different if they're processed, but, like, all the important stuff's in there! Nutrients and electrolytes or whatever.

[ He will never want for sodium in his diet if he eats a packet of this every day. Anyways, it's not meant to be eaten all by itself anyways, so Kano takes another ramen packet, removes the actual block of ramen out of the package and starts squeezing relish onto it, then opens up the fake chicken flavoring and another packet of cayenne pepper to sprinkle on top before holding it out to Wei Wuxian. ]

Carbs, meat, and veggies~ A balanced diet. You can live off this sort of stuff, and it's super lightweight and everything~

Not as good, no! How sad.

[SO SAD. He'll go fetch a napkin with his free hand, though, holding it carefully.]

Want to taste any of this before I clean up? You'd be missing out on an important life experience otherwise and that would be sad, too.

[This fuckin ramen block he's being offered looks absolutely horrific, though?! He takes it, somehow fucking balancing it on his pointer and middle finger while he keeps the napkin tucked between his thumb and the remaining two, instead of just, you know. Switching the napkin to his relish taste-testing arm or grabbing it with that.]

You really are prepared for the life of a-- train-dweller?

Sure am~ Here, I'll help you with that!

[ He will take the napkin and wipe off Wei Wuxian's arm so he can/have no choice but to enjoy the ramen monstrosity to its fullest. The napkin is going directly into the trashcan, or deposited on an empty seat the moment nobody is looking, because he absolutely does not want a taste of any of that. ]

I practically grew up in one of these places, so I know all the ins and outs of dwelling on a train~ Any secret recipes you want to know, you can always ask me!

[DON'T LITTER YOU TERRIBLE GREMLIN not that Wei Wuxian would stop him but Lan Wangji is probably out there, lurking, waiting to bring the rules hammer down on both of them.]

You grew up on a train, you mean? Sounds like an experience. You could go anywhere you wanted that way, couldn't you? Or maybe that's just this train, haha.

[This magicass train that's absolutely skewing his perception of what a train is in general... ANYWAY, he'll break off a chunk of this godawful concoction, getting crumbles of dried noodle and sprinklings of powder all over the floor. After popping it into his mouth, he hums agreeably!]

—Not good! Nope. Are these-- [WHAT EVEN ARE THEY. They looked like noodles, but hard and in a block??] -noodles supposed to be flavorless? That's a bad idea. No wonder you have to add a thousand things to it!

[ What Lan Wangji doesn't know won't hurt him... so this stays hush hush between the two of them. ]

Haha, yeah, something like that~ Are your noodles not like this? How weird!

[ He goes ahead and drops the napkin on a train seat so he can free up both his hands to break himself off a chunk of instant ramen, giving his piece a good shake so all the seasoning and relish chunks and stuff falls off and he's left with just bland teeth-breaking noodles to crunch.

He doesn't remember them being this hard, or the slightly chalky mouthfeel... ]

Mm. Yep! Train noodles are sort of just like this. If you got better noodles, maybe you can revolutionize the train noodle industry?

[A good plan but SOMEHOW... Lan Wangji just knows everything, anyway. Wild.]

No, they're much better. [Said simply... To be fair, noodles don't need to be great to be better than freeze-dried ramen, but he'll take what he can get when Ancient Fantasy China is so far behind the curve with EVERYTHING ELSE.]

--Haha, how is it without the flavors? Bland? A piece of paper would probably have more taste to it! That's not a bad idea, though - especially if we're going to be seeing a lot of this train.

[HE'S ASSUMING THEY ARE.]

[ THEY SURE ARE ]

Super bland~ You put a lot of work chewing something you can barely eat. Strengthens your jaw muscles, you know? Can't let your jaws get weak while living off food packets~

[ It'll probably be better cooked and maybe having soaked up the broth, but whatever. Wei Wuxian can have the rest of the ramen block, because Kano's already pulling back with his hands shoved into his pockets, ready to continue the food tour. ]

Anything you want to bring for the road? We're gonna visit the next car soon, so get 'em while you can!

Haha, you do have an answer for everything, don't you?

[He's impressed by the levels of punkitude in this one small body, honestly. He wonders how many people Kano pisses off on a daily basis and/or tricks into doing terrible, terrible things?? Wild.

Not about to continue gnawing on this hunk of noodle, he'll just wrap it in napkins and shove it into the front of his robes, probably to pass off on some poor unsuspecting soul later.]

Nope, this should suit me just fine! Fingers crossed that there's something nicer in the next cart. Somehow, I was quite lucky until our paths crossed!

[SOMEHOW. But he'll lead the way onward, apparently not deterred.]

Sure do~

[ He sort of prides himself in being able to talk his way out of things, although most of the time it's him opening his mouth that gets him in trouble. The number of people he pisses off is surprisingly low! Because he only interacts with like three people on a daily basis. It's all fine.

He follows on after Wei Wuxian, sliding the door closed behind him before stepping into the next car. Every surface is made of metal, slick and shiny and kind of hard to look at. Not a very warm atmosphere at all. ]

Eh... Wonder what kinda food they have here?

[ Let's see if Wei Wuxian's luck holds up. Kano hops over to the snack cart the moment he lays his eyes on it, and pulls out......!!

It's freeze dried ice cream. ]

[At least he manages to avoid getting his ass whooped by an angry mob that way! Sometimes it's best to just have three people you interact with on a daily basis and throw the towel in there while you're still ahead and in one piece.

BUT ONWARD, TO THE NEXT CAR. He's. He's got no idea what this is. Stupidly, ice cream does exist in his world THANKS CORNETTOS. But freeze dried ice cream looks nothing like what he's used to?? He leans forward, poking at the bag.]

Is this edible? Why are people so obsessed with shoving their snacks into shiny wrappers too, goodness.

[He's a fan, though.]

Shiny wrappers and pretty and crinkly and make things more fun to eat!

[ He picks up one of the packages and gives it a little shake so they can enjoy the crinkly noise— but that also makes the ice cream start to crumble inside the package, whoops. Now it's in easy to share pieces. ]

Here, here, give it a try~ It's ice cream, so it's like...

[ ...salty

is his first impression when he pops a piece into his own mouth while holding the package out to Wei Wuxian. Apparently freeze dried ice cream can be weirdly salty, weirdly light, and weirdly crumbly. ]

Well, you're not wrong about that! I think I'd like it if all of my food came in shiny wrappers. Maybe I can work on that once I get back!

[Bringing foil and freeze dried ice cream to ancient fantasy China...

But he'll reach forward to fish a piece out of the bag, too! If it's ice cream, he's excited!! ...And summarily disappointed when it turns out to be so weird.]

—Is it? You know, some things about this place are great, but they really can be hit and miss with the food. The fried dough is so good, but this is so... [SO......] --Well! Variety keeps life exciting and all, I guess.

[ Ancient fantasy China would laud him for introducing foil packaging to their food, I'm sure. ]

Maybe it was supposed to be mixed with something, like the relish? Ah, well~ What's this fried dough that got your stamp of approval? Was it in one of your lucky previous carts?

[ If Kano has to taste test things too, he doesn't want to eat more disappointing space food. ]

[They love all of his other inventions!! Add one more to the pile, even if this one he's just yoinking from the future.]

Haha, that sounds bad. [Even he doesn't want to try that combo??

But at the question, he just nods! And then digs into his endless merlin robes to extract another bundle of napkins. When he opens this one, there are a bunch of mini churros inside!]

Here! Give one of these a try - they really are good, I promise!

[This isn't an elaborate revenge scheme!!]

[ Kano's trying to imagine just how much he'd be able to squirrel away if he had infinite sleeves like that too, but he's distracted by the churros that he hasn't had before, but he can tell that it's a donut of some sort.

Anything deep fried, crunchy, and sugary is A+++ in his book, so he gives one a try, thinking that if it is an elaborate revenge scheme— for what? Kano was nothing but kind and helpful towards Wei Wuxian— he could always spit it back out and literally nobody can blame him. ]

[Fortunately for everyone, they're perfectly normal churros. Still a bit warm, even! He'd only recently pilfered them when they were hot and fresh.]

What do you think? Not bad at all, right? These would go well with some real ice cream! We should see if they have any.

[Because drowning himself in sweets from other cars isn't enough?? One can never consume Too Much Sugar.]

[ Wei Wuxian is a terrifying man who keeps piping hot churros in his sleeves. ]

Yeah, that's right! It'd have to be in a car with a freezer, right? Let's go, let's go~ We can skip the cars that don't have that sort of thing~

[ He snatches something off the snack cart here before they leave, though, in case they come across the disappointing scenario where they find a freezer but there's no ice cream inside. Shuuya Kano is always prepared for such disappointing scenarios. ]

[me immediately slapping that onto his profile]

Are any cars more likely to have them than others? I've seen a few iceboxes but they've been pretty scattered, honestly.

[See: in this next car, where the snack trolley area looks more like the concession stand of a movie theater.]

[ Kano hums thoughtfully while he looks around this next cart, grabs a bottle of coke, empties it into a bag of popcorn so it can soak up the soda without dripping onto the floor, and hands that to Wei Wuxian. It's for throwing away, not for eating, but either way. The empty coke bottle gets pumped full of mustard, recapped, and handed over to join the soggy popcorn. ]

Let's keep going. If we want to find a car with a freezer, look for fancy stuff! Wines and spirits and whatever are always served on the rocks, right? So if there's ice, there's gotta be a freezer nearby~

[WHAT WAS THE POINT OF ALL OF THIS. Curiously, Wei Wuxian tries one (1) soggy popcorn piece and promptly decides not to eat anymore. Bad! He's still going to carry both this nasty bag and gross bottle full of mustard, though. He doesn't know what Kano wants them for??]

Are they? [He's learning so much.] Mm, well! If it's drinks we're after, there's a car back that way that had an entire cabin full of them.

[He jerks his thumb over his shoulder in the direction he'd come from.]

Don't remember seeing any ice cream, though. Maybe there's a better one up ahead?

[ Don't worry about it.

Kano turns on his heels, looking back over his shoulder at the closed door that really doesn't tell him anything, before turning back with a decisive nod. ]

Yeah, let's keep going~ We're men on a mission, so there's no going back!

[ He is going to forward march into the next car, and unless the car 1) is filled wall to wall with glass bottles, or 2) is an entire freezer room itself, he's not going to stop. It's an infinite train, so they'll find something eventually, he thinks; there's no point in stopping and wasting time on Possible ice cream carts when they can waste time finding a Guaranteed ice cream cart. ]

[Why is Kano an agent of chaos?? But fair enough, he has too much energy for a grownass man and doesn't at all seem troubled to be wandering through the train void with this stranger.]

A good mission to have! Ah, wait— [Oh no he's DISTRACTED ALREADY. They wander through one of the food carts without a fridge in sight and he's absolutely veering off because he smells something tasty.]

What's that? It smells good! Is that chicken?

[It's a buffalo wing bar, hoo boy.]

[ He's an agent of chaos here to escort King Chaos, apparently. ]

Oh man, look at all those dipping sauces... Should've saved the bottle if I knew!

[ He would have dabbed one of each twenty sauces into the bottle and given it a good shake, but it's a fate they avoid for now. ]

But yeah, yeah, it looks like chicken~ What a good nose! Like a bloodhound~

[King Chaos with his bloodhound chicken nose...]

We can always dump this one out! Unless you need it for something. [DON'T ENCOURAGE THIS.

He himself is not about to waste the opportunity to try food that smells good, though. After shifting his soggy popcorn and mustard bottle to the crook of his arm and grabbing a chicken wing, he circles the sauce bar curiously, looking for something that seems Extra Tasty.]

Having all of these choices is almost too much, you know? I can hardly pick! You'd have to eat all of the chicken here to get a good sample of everything.

No, no, it's real important we keep that one, so we can't dump it out! We'll find something else to substitute~

[ He'll think about what to do, while circling the chicken wing bar himself. Some of those dipping sauces are alarmingly red and he already knows to avoid them, but Mister King Chaos here would probably love them. ]

Hm. Well! There's nobody else here, so don't be shy~ You might as well eat all the chicken to get a good sample of everything!

[ That's Wei Wuxian specifically, Kano not partaking. He's getting a poptart out of his pocket and carefully opening up one end of it so he can eat the pop tart inside and collect dipping sauces inside the wrapper. ]

Just point out the ones you like best, and I'll keep a sample for you!

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